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Essays and Insights


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Moses vs. Freud: Can Marriage Thrive?

3 Comments
Whom to Marry

No other decision you will make in the course of your lifetime will affect you as deeply and as irrevocably
7 Comments
The Search for a Soul Mate

What are the first qualities one should look for in our search for their soul mate? A lesson from approach Eliezer, Abraham's messenger to search for a bride for Isaac
1 Comment
Finding Love

"I want someone who's kind but not the too-kind type that lets himself be walked on, smart but not haughty, assertive but not overbearing, handsome but not vain.." The Rebbe laughed. "It sounds like you want to marry more than one person"
13 Comments
Holy Matrimony?

If the Torah tells us that a particular union is not kosher, rather than resenting the interference we should consider it as if the Almighty Himself came down and whispered a word of loving advice in our ears: "Trust me; this one is not right for you..."
1 Comment
Human or Beast?
The Torah's views and safeguards against sexual abuse

To many, these laws appear extreme, over-reactive and unnecessary. A little 1st-grader can't hug her daddy's best friend? Two adult co-workers of the opposite sex can’t work alone in the office to finish an important project?
3 Comments
An Arranged Marriage

Had Isaac and Rebecca met in the modern age, their courtship might have looked something like this. Isaac would notice Rebecca at the well...
22 Comments
Yiddishe Nachas

The "singles" phenomenon is arguably the single biggest social problem in the Jewish world today. We could well take a cue from the first Jewish father who needed to find a shidduch for his son - Abraham
The Rebbe Speaks to College Students
1963

The Lubavitcher Rebbe answers questions posed by a group of college students on dating and marriage, Jewish identity, religion and ethics, moshiach and the future
Split Your Sea
If you were given a glimpse of your subconscious personality, what would you find?

"To match couples together is as difficult as the splitting of the sea," the Talmud states. Why, from all miracles described in the Bible, does the Talmud choose specifically the miracle of the splitting of the sea to capture the process of marriage?
2 Comments
Secrets to a Successful Second Marriage

One would think that an individual who has gone through a divorce would have “learned his lesson” and will, therefore, not repeat the mistakes of the past. But often this isn't the case.
7 Comments
The Wedding Jitters

You are engaged. You are definitely glowing, though you're not sure if it is from joy or sweat. Where is the fairytale that you pictured for so many years? What is wrong with you?
6 Comments
Marriage and Family Life

A treasury of thoughts and aphorism gleaned from the wisdom of the Torah and the Jewish sages which will enrich your wedding and marriage.
1 Comment
Tzimtzum

The text of the traditional engagement contract alludes to the cosmic energies which are unleashed by a Jewish marriage, a throwback to the supernal mechanisms which led to the creation of the worlds.
3 Comments
The Power of Acceptance

One of the reasons for the ancient Jewish custom to cover a bride's face during the marriage ceremony is to symbolize the complete acceptance that is integral to any enduring relationship
What Do We Do About the Relationship Crisis?

Genuine love not only respects the individuality of the other but actually seeks to cultivate it. Love, like the act of creation, is the courageous act of creating space for the presence of the other.
22 Comments
Ring, Round and Roof
The three mysteries of marriage

Eliezer gave Rebecca a ring, betrothing her to Isaac; ever since, rings, circles and enveloping structures have facilitated the union of man and woman. The Kabbalistic masters delve into the mystery of the circle to understand the unifying force that violates all the laws of ego and identity
1 Comment
Samech — To Support and Heal

The shape, meaning, and numerical value of the Hebrew letter samech, teaches much about marriage, and the spiritual powers which powers the marital institution.
A Wild Idea
The Kabbalah of Marriage

Marriage is a pretty bizarre concept. It must have been G-d's idea. Who else could think of such a whacky plan like bringing together two opposites and putting them under one roof to share a life?
9 Comments
Men are from Chochmah; Women are from Binah

She'll ask about his day. He'll answer that it was good or bad. If he remembers to reciprocate, he'll soon be wondering when or if she'll ever finish her litany of endless, intricate and irrelevant details and get to the important parts
4 Comments
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